The most annoying and most common male sexual problem is premature ejaculation. This condition is best described as being the inability to delay ejaculation to a point that is mutually desirable for both partners.
Some men, especially young men that are still on their training wheels will not be able to control their orgasm upon sexual contact. While common with those just learning to have intercourse it also occurs with men of all ages and experience levels. Not all premature-ejaculation is upon entry. Some males may ejaculate within just a few minutes of copulation. The ejaculation is so rapid that while the male may have climaxed he was unable to satisfy his partner. Premature ejaculation results when the male does not have control of ejaculatory response and is not aware of the erotic sensations that lead to the “point of inevitability”.
Premature Ejaculation Made Clear:
A 62-year-old man goes into the pharmacy and asks the sales lady at the counter for condoms. What size do you wear ask the clerk? I don’t know replies the man! She has the man unzip his pants so she can check. Over the intercom she announces, “Large condoms needed at the pharmacy counter”. A 36-year-old man follows directly to the counter and as the lady clerk for condoms. What size do you wear she asked? I don’t know the man replies. After having the man unzip his pants she announces over the intercom “Extra
large condoms needed at the pharmacy counter”. A 15-year-old boy who oversees this feels he just might get lucky. He goes up to the counter and says I need condoms but don’t know what size I should wear. The clerk has the boy unzip his pants so she can check. Over the intercom is promptly heard, “cleanup at the pharmacy counter”.
Typically a young man will reach orgasm quicker than an older man, as he has not yet learned to control the ejaculation. It has been shown that the longer the period since the last orgasm the quicker a young man may reach orgasm.
Delaying Ejaculation:
A number of techniques are available to assist in delaying ejaculation. Some of these require the use of products and others are methods that can be learned that will teach the male his point of ejaculation and how to delay climax.
Masturbation:
Some males that experience premature ejaculation will masturbate prior to having other forms of sex. For some this may help but for others it has no affect, as they still are very aroused upon sexual contact. Some couples will practice mutual masturbation or oral sex prior to intercourse and again this may or may not work.
Desentitizing Cream:
A desensitizing cream is applied to the penis prior to intercourse. The cream will decrease the sensation felt by the male, extending the time needed to ejaculate. The cream may also numb your partners vagina so she may not be too happy.
Condoms:
Condoms will reduce the amount of stimulation during sex, helping to prevent premature ejaculation by lowering the arousal. Where still experiencing rapid ejaculation, two condoms can be worn to decrease stimulation even more.
Masters & Johnson Method:
Masters and Johnson found that the best way to delay ejaculation was to learn how to identify and control the sensation that leads to orgasm. This method is effective by it does require practice. The following procedure needs to be repeated on many different occasions until you learn your point of climax. Once you have an understanding of where your “point of no return” is, you will be able to direct stimulation from your partner and have more control over your point of ejaculation. Remember though that this is not an overnight fix and will need to be practices several times until you have achieved control over your ejaculation.
- Through masturbation, bring yourself to a point relatively close to climax and stop.
- Each time you repeat step 1 you will have brought yourself closer to orgasm and eventually to the point of ejaculation.
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This technique can be practiced alone or with a partner using either masturbation or oral sex. Just prior to the point of ejaculation the partner will either apply a light squeeze to the penis. The squeeze will force the blood out of the penis and reduce the erection.
Once you are able to control your ejaculations you will now practice it with intercourse. For the purpose of controlling ejaculation the missionary (man on top) position is not the most effective. You will have better control in the female dominate position where the female is on top and the male on his back. When the male is on his back he will be more relaxed and be able to better guide his partner.
- Once ready for intercourse, lie on your back and direct your partner to slowly enter your penis into her.
- At the point you feel that you are going to climax, signal your partner to pull off and relax prior to starting over.
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With practice you will soon be able to control your ejaculation and be able to remove those training wheels and enjoy sex more. If you are still experiencing premature ejaculation you may still need more practice with the solo masturbation or partner technique or may want to try the stimulation technique.
Stimulation Technique:
Some men find that while they are able to control the ejaculation using the Master and Johnson solo and/or partner technique, they are not able to control premature ejaculation with intercourse. When a partner is involved it is certainly normal to become more aroused. With this technique stimulation will be added between masturbation and intercourse. Stimulation teaches you to control a greater amount of arousal then you will experience with masturbation alone. For this technique you will use an artificial vagina type masturbation toy and lubricant to simulate intercourse. Get lots of practice for as we say, “practice makes perfect”.
How Long Would You Like To Last? How Long Is Long Enough?
Many of us have been and unfortunately many males still are “3 minute men”. Early sexuality studies of western sexuality found that in the 1930’s intercourse was averaging 1-½ minutes prior to ejaculation. Here in the 2000’s your three-minute men have doubled that “wow”, you are still in the 1960’s where the average was about 3 minutes. By the mid 1990’s the average actually moved up to about 5 minutes so you are still about ten years behind. Unfortunately 5 or 10 minutes is not a heck of a lot of time. The average female requires about 12 to 15 minutes to achieve orgasm so as you can see, way too many women are not being satisfied.
You probably think that you are lasting a whole lot longer then 10 minutes and perhaps you are. I have a challenge for you: The next time you have intercourse check the time upon entry and deduct this from the time of ejaculation, I bet most of you will be able to add the time up on your fingers.
Would you like to make those good orgasms fantastic?
You can do just that through extending your time of ejaculation. Your orgasms can be so great that you whole body will quiver as you erupt like a volcano. Your woman will enjoy her orgasm or even orgasms and will be so hot that she can hardly wait for her next love making session.
Technique For Lasting Longer:
- The most sensitive part of the vagina is the outer inch or so. Slowly enter to this depth and then draw back until making contact with the lips.
- Repeat step one several times.
- Go deeper but very slow (I know that fast thrusting is what you want to do but control yourself).
- Now go very shallow again, about one inch slowly thrusting up to the lips and back about one inch again.
- Alternate the shallow slow thrusting with the deeper slow thrusting.
- Take notice of the sensation you are experiencing with this new technique.
- Notice how her moist vagina is hugging your penis.
- While performing the shallow and deep slow thrust, become aware of the sensations you are experiencing and how your partner is responding at the different depths.
- Do not allow your mind to wander and do not fantasize, just concentrate on these shallow and deep slow thrusts.
- Control your breathing, do not allow your self to get to the point of panting and do not hold your breath. Take long, deep breaths as you fill your lungs and then empty them.
- Do not close your eyes as this will help you to concentrate and you will be able to look your lover in her eyes and notice the excitement she is feeling.
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Also See: Male Sexual Disorders and Dissatisfactions>>
If you are experiencing a sexual dysfunction learn to overcome it and if needed get professional help. Life is short and sex is wonderful so don’t give up.
