Getting Over a Breakup
November 17, 2008 by Mystery
Filed under Featured, Relationships, humor
It’s only been two months since your relationship ended, and it wasn’t your choice. You’ve analyzed every conversation you ever had with him, and you’ve stayed awake many nights replaying his horrid words that he was ending your relationship. It is often not easy getting over a breakup. We will often wonder how do I learn to trust again. Read more
GOVT. JOB POSTING
A man applies for a job at the Post Office.
The interviewer asks him, ‘Are you allergic to anything?’ He says ‘Yes - just caffeine’
‘Have you ever been in the service?’
‘Yes,’ he says. ’I was in Iraq for two years.’
The interviewer says, ‘That will give you five extra points toward employment,’ and then asks, ‘Are you disabled in any way?
The guy says, ‘Yes 100%. An IED exploded near me and blew my testicles off.’
The interviewer tells the guy, ‘O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now. Normal hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM.
You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.’
The guy is puzzled and says, ‘If the hours are from 8 AM to 4 PM, why don’t you want me to be here before 10 AM?
‘This is a government job,’ the interviewer says. ‘For the first two hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point in you coming in for that.’
remove_after_crosslinking9 Things I Dislike About Everyone
Stud Rooster
A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, ‘Okay old fart time for you to retire!’
The old rooster replies, ‘Come on, surely you cannot handle all of these chickens, look what it has done to me.
The young rooster says, ‘Can’t you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?’
The old rooster says,’Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking over, I tell you what, young stud. I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop.’
The young rooster laughs. ‘You know you don’t stand a chance, old man. so, just to be fair, I will give you a head start.’
The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap.
he is only about 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining fast. The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by.
The Old Rooster is squawking
and running as hard as he can.
The Farmer grabs his shotgun and - BOOM - he blows the young rooster to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head and says,
‘Dammit….. third gay rooster I bought this month.’
Moral of this story?
Don’t mess with the THE OLDER GENERATION
age, skill, wisdom, and a little treachery
always overcome youth and arrogance!
Tough Love vs. Spanking - Good Argument
Most of the American populace thinks it improper to spank children, so I have tried other methods to control my kids when they have one of ‘those moments.’ One that I found effective is for me to just take the child for a car ride and talk.
Some say it’s the vibration from the car, others say it’s the time away from any distractions such as TV, Video Games, Computer, IPod, etc.
Either way, my kids usually calm down and stop misbehaving after our car ride together. Eye to eye contact helps a lot too.
I’ve included a photo below of one of my sessions with my son, in case you would like to use the technique.
This works with grandchildren, nieces, and nephews as well.
Sincerely,
A Friend of Ask Uncle Terry
I can’t get no satisfaction
My boyfriend is losing the sensitivity on his penis. He doesn’t have a problem getting an erection just keeping it. He cant even get off from masturbation because of no sensitivity is there. What is going on?
Pam Read more
Women Drivers
September 12, 2008 by UncleTerry
Filed under humor
This morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Cadillac doing 65 mph with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner. I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that makeup. Read more
Foods Effect on Sexual Performance
On the one hand it is said that men think about sex every few seconds. On the other hand there is a multi-billion dollar industry in pharmaceuticals for treatment of erectile and sexual dysfunction. Obviously there is a significant disconnect between the desire to perform compared with the ability to perform effectively. Read more
Male Yeast Infection Cause and Prevention
Male yeast infections are a lot more common than most people realize. For the men that suffer from these yeast infections it’s a never ending, up and down roller coaster of pain and suffering. Read more
Masturbation for Couples
August 14, 2008 by UncleTerry
Filed under Articles, Sex Issues
There are times when people fall into a rut and are unable to enjoy the simple pleasure of sex. The foregoing of sexual pleasure with our mate is unacceptable and impedes sexual health. There is no excuse for losing enjoyment during any sexual activity. One of the best ways to kick-start the lust back into your life is by masturbating with your partner. Read more
